Man Waving from Empire State Building Construction Site

Sometimes Trusting God is Hard

Sometimes God uses prayer to teach us more about himself and sometimes he uses it to teach us more about ourselves. This morning as I was walking to work, I was praying about a number of things. As I began to pray for our church plant I was confessing some of my worries and fears and then I said, “God, I want to know whats going to happen…”  Now some people might think this is an innocent request, but I knew when I said it, it wasn’t an innocent request from me. It was me declaring that I don’t want to have to trust God. I want to know what’s going to happen so I can plan and respond. It forced me to realize that I don’t want to be in a situation where I have to trust God. In my desire to control I want to be in a church where I can known (and influence) who will be joining our church and who will be leaving. I want to known that each weeks offering will more than enough to cover our expenses and pad our account more and more so that as a church we can trust God less.  Yet, God in his wisdom has placed me in a place of dependance on him. He has put me in great church, but one that isn’t overflowing with resources right now.  It’s causing me to grow my in my trust of him, and while I don’t always like it, I need it.